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《人性的弱点》第2篇 第5章 如何使人感到兴趣

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小编摘要:如何使人感到兴趣?就别人的兴趣谈论。

每一个去牡蛎湾,拜访过罗斯福的人,对他渊博的学识,都会感到惊奇。勃莱福特曾经这样说过:「无论是一个牧童或骑士,政客或是外交家,罗斯福都知道应该跟他说些什么。」那又是怎么回事呢?答案很简单,在接见来访的客人之前,罗斯福已准备好了那位客人所喜爱说的话题,和对方特别感到兴趣的事。
Everyone who was ever a guest of Theodore Rooseveltwas astonished at the range and diversity of his knowledge.Whether his visitor was a cowboy or a RoughRider, a New York politician or a diplomat, Rooseveltknew what to say. And how was it done? The answerwas simple. Whenever Roosevelt expected a visitor, hesat up late the night before, reading up on the subject in
  罗斯福就跟其它具有领袖才干的人一样,他知道这回事。深入人们心底的最佳途径,就是对那人讲他知道得最多的事物。
  which he knew his guest was particularly interested.
  前任耶鲁大学文学院教授「费尔浦司」;早年就知道了这项道理,他有这样说过:
  For Roosevelt knew, as all leaders know, that the royalroad to a person’s heart is to talk about the things he orshe treasures most.
  「在我八岁的时候,某个周末的星期六,我去姑妈的家渡假。那天晚上有位中年人也去我姑妈家,他跟姑妈寒喧过后,就注意到我身上。那时我对帆船有极大的兴趣,而那位客人谈到这话题上时,似乎也很感到兴趣,我们谈得非常投机。他走了后,我对姑妈说,这人真好,他对帆船也极感兴趣。姑妈告诉我,那客人是一位律师,照说他对帆船方面不会有兴趣的。我问:「可是他又怎么一直说帆船的事呢?』
  The genial William Lyon Phelps, essayist and professorof literature at Yale, learned this lesson early in life.
  姑妈对我说:。他是一位有修养的绅士,他让自己到处受到欢迎,所以才找着你所感到兴起的话题,陪你谈论帆船。』」
  "When I was eight years old and was spending aweekend visiting my Aunt Libby Linsley at her home inStratford on the Housatonic,” he wrote in his essay onHuman Nature, “a middle-aged man called one evening,and after a polite skirmish with my aunt, he devoted hisattention to me. At that time, I happened to be excitedabout boats, and the visitor discussed the subject in away that seemed to me particularly interesting. After heleft, I spoke of him with enthusiasm. What a man! Myaunt informed me he was a New York lawyer, that hecared nothing whatever about boats - that he took notthe slightest interest in the subject. ‘But why then didhe talk all the time about boats?’
  费尔浦司教授又说:「我永远不会忘记,姑妈所讲的那些话。」
  " ‘Because he is a gentleman. He saw you were interestedin boats, and he talked about the things he knewwould interest and please you. He made himself agreeable.’ "
  当我在写这一个章节时,我面前有一封信,那是热心童子军工作的基尔夫先生寄来的。
  And William Lyon Phelps added: "I never forgot myaunt’s remark.”
  基尔夫在信上这样写着:「有一天,我需要找个人帮忙,原因是欧洲将举行一次童子军大露营;我要请美国一家大公司,资助我一个童子军的旅费。
  As I write this chapter, I have before me a letter fromEdward L. Chalif, who was active in Boy Scout work.
  在我会见那位大老板之前;听说他曾签出过一张百万元的支票,随后又把那张支票作废
  “One day I found I needed a favor,” wrote Mr. Chalif.“A big Scout jamboree was coming off in Europe, and Iwanted the president of one of the largest corporationsin America to pay the expenses of one of my boys for thetrip.
  ,后来他把那张支票装人镜框,作为纪念。
  “Fortunately, just before I went to see this man, Iheard that he had drawn a check for a million dollars,and that after it was canceled, he had had it framed.
  所以我走进他办公室的第一件事,就是请求让我观赏那张支票。我告诉他,我从没有听说,有人开过百万元的支票,我要跟我那些童子军们讲,我的确见到过一张百万元的支票了。他很高兴的取出来给我看,我表示羡慕、赞美,同时请他告诉我,开出这张支票的经过情形。」
  “So the first thing I did when I entered his office wasto ask to see the check. A check for a million dollars! Itold him I never knew that anybody had ever written
  你注意到没到?基尔夫先生开始并没有就即谈到童子军的事和他的来意,而只是谈谈对方最感兴趣的事。结果又如何呢?基尔夫信上这样说:
  such a check, and that I wanted to tell my boys that I hadactually seen a check for a million dollars. He gladlyshowed it to me; I admired it and asked him to tell meall about how it happened to be drawn.”
  「那位经理随后问我:「哦,你找我有什么事吗?」于是我就告诉他我的来意。
  You notice, don’t you, that Mr. Chalif didn’t begin bytalking about the Boy Scouts, or the jamboree in Europe,or what it was he wanted? He talked in terms of whatinterested the other man. Here’s the result:
  那真出乎我的意料之外,他不但立即答应我的要求,且比我原来要求的还要多。我只希望他赞助一个童子军去欧洲,可是他愿意资助五个童子军去欧洲,而且连我自己也受请在内。他签了一张千元外汇银行支付的凭证,叫我们在欧洲住七个星期。他又替我写了几封介绍信:吩咐欧洲各城市分公司的经理,妥善的照顾我们。
  “Presently, the man I was interviewing said: ‘Oh, bythe way, what was it you wanted to see me about?’ So Itold him.
  继后,他自己去欧洲,在巴黎亲自接待我们,带领我们游览全市………最后,他还替几
  “To my vast surprise,” Mr. Chalif continues, “he notonly granted immediately what I asked for, but muchmore. I had asked him to send only one boy to Europe,but he sent five boys and myself, gave me a letter ofcredit for a thousand dollars and told us to stay in Europefor seven weeks. He also gave me letters of introductionto his branch presidents, putting them at our service,and he himself met us in Paris and showed us the town.
  个家境清寒的童子军,为他们介绍工作。这位大老板,现在还尽其所能,在资助、帮忙这个童子军团体。
  Since then, he has given jobs to some of the boys whoseparents were in want, and he is still active in our group.
  当然这是我所知道的,如果事前没有找出他兴趣所在,使他高兴起来,很不可能会这样顺利地跟他接近的。」
  “Yet I know if I hadn’t found out what he was interestedin, and got him warmed up first, I wouldn’t havefound him one-tenth as easy to approach.”
  在商场上,这也是一种有价值的方法吗?我现在再举一个例子:
  Is this a valuable technique to use in business? Is it?Let’s see, Take Henry G. Duvernoy of Duvemoy andSons, a wholesale baking firm in New York.
  纽约有一家面包公司经理杜凡诺先生,希望把自己公司的面包卖给一家大旅馆。四年来,他一直打这个主意,几乎每星期都去找那家旅馆的经理。杜凡诺如果知道那位经理去那一家交际场所,为希望有个接触见面的机会,他也跟着去那家交际场所。他甚至于在那家旅馆租下一间房间,只为获得生意,可是他都失败了。
  Mr. Duvernoy had been trying to sell bread to a certainNew York hotel. He had called on the managerevery week for four years. He went to the same socialaffairs the manager attended. He even took rooms in thehotel and lived there in order to get the business. But hefailed.
  杜凡诺先生说:「后来,我研究了人与人之间的关系后,才知道应该改变策略,想办法找出他最感兴趣的事。那一方面会引起他的注意?」
  “Then,” said Mr. Duvernoy, “after studying humanrelations, I resolved to change my tactics. I decided tofind out what interested this man - what caught his enthusiasm.
  我发现他是美国旅馆业公会的会员,他不但是会员,由于热心的推进这个团体的业务,所以后来被推举为这团体的主席。同时,他还兼任了国际旅馆业联合会的会长,不论开会地点在那里,他都搭乘飞机,飞越高山,横渡沙漠、大海,去那里开会。
  “I discovered he belonged to a society of hotel executives called the Hotel Greeters of America. He not onlybelonged, but his bubbling enthusiasm had made himpresident of the organization, and president of the InternationalGreeters. No matter where its conventions wereheld, he would be there.
  所以我在第二天见他的时候,就问他关于该会的详细情形,果然得到了一个极好的反应--他跟我讲了半小时关于那会里的情形。他说的时候,是那么的兴高采烈,我已明显的看出,那个团体组织是他兴趣所在,也是他生活中的一部份,在我跟他分手前,他邀我加入他们的团体。
  “So when I saw him the next day, I began talkingabout the Greeters. What a response I got. What a response!He talked to me for half an hour about theGreeters, his tones vibrant with enthusiasm. I couldplainly see that this society was not only his hobby, itwas the passion of his life. Before I left his office, he had‘sold’ me a membership in his organization.
  那时我并没提到面包的事,几天后,他旅馆里的管事,打了一个电话给我,要我把面包的价目,和样品送过去。
  “In the meantime, I had said nothing about bread. Buta few days later, the steward of his hotel phoned me tocome over with samples and prices.
  我走进那家旅馆,?面那管事招呼我,说:『我不知道你在那老头儿身上,下了些什么功夫………可是,真的,你搔到他的痒处了。」
  " ‘I don’t know what you did to the old boy,’ the stewardgreeted me, ‘but he sure is sold on you!’
  我回答说:、你该替我想一想--我在他身上花了四年时间,想要做到他的生意。如果不煞费脑筋找出他兴趣所在,他所喜欢的是什么,那还得要费不知多少时间呢!。
  “Think of it! I had been drumming at that man for fouryears - trying to get his business - and I’d still be drummingat him if I hadn’t finally taken the trouble to findout what he was interested in, and what he enjoyed talkingabout.”
  所以,如果你要使别人喜欢你,那第五项规则是:
  Edward E. Harriman of Hagerstown, Maryland, choseto live in the beautiful Cumberland Valley of Marylandafter he completed his military service. Unfortunately,at that time there were few jobs available in the area. Alittle research uncovered the fact that a number of companiesin the area were either owned or controlled by anunusual business maverick, R. J. Funkhouser, whoserise from poverty to riches intrigued Mr. Harriman.However, he was known for being inaccessible to jobseekers. Mr. Harriman wrote:
  就别人的兴趣谈论。
  "I interviewed a number of people and found that hismajor interest was anchored in his drive for power andmoney. Since he protected himself from people like meby use of a dedicated and stern secretary, I studied herinterests and goals and only then I paid an unannouncedvisit at her office. She had been Mr. Funkhouser’s orbitingsatellite for about fifteen years. When I told her Ihad a proposition for him which might translate itself
标签:人性的弱点
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2011-01-14 14:43 编辑:kuaileyingyu
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