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畅想一下女权世界里的美男标准

所属:成长励志 作者:网络转载 阅读:8936 次 评论:5 条 [我要评论]  [+我要收藏]

我们已经花了不少时间讨论女性美的标准,以及女性为何要花费大量时间在修饰外貌上。现在让我们想象,我们所在的世界就是一个女人称王,女总统、女老板横行,女性制定审美标准的社会,那将会是怎样的一番情形呢?我们或许可以称之为女权世界—一个女性以貌取人,男性必须奉行女性为之设定的魅力标准的理想国度。在这个国度里,丑男毫无立足之地,既娶不到媳妇也升不了职,而女人们则可以在饭馆里招呼着那些腰围30英寸、身材健硕的壮男服务生们花天酒地寻欢作乐。
We sure spend a lot of time talking about the ideal female beauty—and why women spend so much time obsessing about it. But what if we lived in a world where women had always been the kings, the presidents, the bosses (and, thus, the arbiters of beauty)? Perhaps we'd call it a "Gynocracy"—a place where superficial women would set the standards for attractiveness, and men would have to conform to them. It would be a place where ugly men would have a hard time getting a date or a promotion, and the women would burn off steam over beers at a restaurant called Hunks, where all the waiters must have 30-inch waists and grapefruit-sized biceps.
电视里绝对不会出现腆着大肚腩、谢顶的、年老色衰的男人。情景喜剧也充斥着丰满诙谐女和壮硕帅男的配搭。放眼美容沙龙、整形诊所以及纤体机构,全都是希望一掷千金换来女性垂涎的倒三角身材的男人。在女权世界中,男人花在修饰外貌上的钱绝对会把我们这个世界里的男人吓傻。想象一下,如果从办公室里随机抽取一组男同事,并告诉他们要按照女权世界中一系列男性美标准打造自己,那可能会是以下标准:
You certainly wouldn't see many paunchy, balding, older guys on TV. Sitcoms would feature couples where the men are tall, muscular, and hot, while the wives are chubby and witty. Salons, cosmetic-surgery offices and Weight Watchers meetings would be filled with men who spend a fortune trying to get that iconic masculine "V" shape women crave. And the maintenance—ah, the maintenance!—would shock men in our world. Think if you took a random group of men from your office and told them that they had to conform to the standard grooming norms of the Gynocracy. The rules might look something like this:
1.定期做蜜蜡脱毛:
1. Weekly forearm waxing
手臂和手肘不能有汗毛。女权社会中的男性为了保持良好的形象,必须要用剃刀刮除或是用蜜蜡脱去前臂的体毛。如果没有剃毛,就不能撸起袖子,即便是炎炎夏日也不行。如果想穿短袖衣服,或是和女人约会,男人就必须刮除前臂的汗毛,保持肌肤的柔软光滑。
No hairy arms or knuckles. To keep up with the beauty ideal in the Gynocracy, men have to wax or shave their forearms. To avoid it, some men just keep their sleeves rolled down—even in the summer. But if they want to wear short sleeves, or get a date with a woman, they absolutely have to be smooth and shaven from the elbow down.
2. 矮个男需增高:穿高跟鞋或接受增高术
2. For the short guy: heels or leg extenders
在女权社会中,凡是身高低于5英尺10英寸的男人都会不自在。杂志中和公司中全是高个帅男。因此,矮个男人几乎都要穿着坡跟鞋。当然你可以选择不穿,但周围的人都穿会给你造成心理压力。再说,大多数男人其实还是喜欢自己的腿长一些,个子高一些的。
Any guy shorter than 5 feet 10 feels uncomfortable in the Gynocracy—magazines are filled with tall men, as are the boardrooms. So, most short men wear big wedge heels. A guy could choose not to conform, but it might be tough when all the other men are wearing heels. Plus, lots of guys like the way they look with longer legs.
3. 谢顶男需植发:
3. Hair replacement
在女权世界中,男性秃顶,甚至头发稀少都是无法接受的。那些不幸患有脱发症的男人通常都要戴着帽子或接受植发,头发稀疏的会竭尽全力使之浓密。美容沙龙里人满为患,男人们都希望做出时尚、茂密、自然微卷的发型,以博得女人的垂青。
Being bald or even having thinning hair is just as unacceptable in the Gynocracy. So guys who are unlucky enough to be losing their hair usually wear hats, or get hair replacement. Even the ones with thinning hair get extensions—and the salons are just full of men trying to get that fashionable, thick, wavy hair women like so much. Some say they’re doing it for themselves.
4. 白发男需染发:
4. Hair coloring for him
女权世界中不允许有头发花白男。女人可以放任自己头发变花白,甚至全白—人们还会觉得白头发女人看起来更聪明,更火辣,更显高贵。但男人绝对不行。因此那些上了岁数却不想让自己看起来“已经过景”的男人通常都会利用午休时间跑去补染发根。
There simply aren't gray-haired men. Women can let themselves go gray, or even have white hair—people think they look smarter, hotter, more "distinguished." But men? Never. So guys of a certain age who don't want to look like they've passed their "use-by" date are always running off at lunchtime to get their roots done.
5. 紧腹手术和锻炼腹肌:
5. Tummy tucks and Ab work
在女权世界中,男人追求的时尚是紧身T恤。因此男人们都会痴迷地追求平坦的小腹。对于那些因为中年发福而有啤酒肚的男人来说,这一时尚标准令他们的日子很不好过。女老板一般都会比较留意那些穿着紧身衣的年轻男下属。
Because the style for men in the Gynocracy is to wear skin-tight T shirts, men are obsessed with having a flat stomach. Older guys with the intractable paunches that sometimes come with middle age have a very hard time with these fashions. And of course female bosses are always paying more attention to the young guys in the tight shirts.
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2010-07-28 23:39 编辑:kuaileyingyu
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