Choose a place you go to often that is important to you and explain why it is important. Please include specific details in your explanation.
The most important place to me is library. I like reading very much. In library I can read books I want, novels, science books, even history books. The knowledge I want is prepared to me.
（1） Original: In library I can read books I want, novels, science books, even history books.
Revised: In library I can read books I want, such as, novels, science books, even history books.
其实他还可以从study, rest, date这几个分支来阐述。具体可以这样表述：Sometimes I can study there. Because it is a very quiet place; it is also a good place for me to take a rest. I can relax in the library. As nobody bothers me there; moreover, the library provides a wonderful environment for lovers to have a date.很明显添加这些内容之后，整个陈述就显得很完整了！
Some college students choose to take courses in a variety of subject areas in order to get a broad education. Others choose to focus on a single subject area in order to have a deeper understanding of that area. Which approach to course selection do you think is better for students and why?
I think the college students should choose subjects about many area not just choose a single subject. Because the subjects connect with each other. Many subjects are the foundation of others. They should learn more about other subjects.
(1)首句如果改为：I think it is better for college students to choose a variety of subject areas in order to get a broad education. 这样会使你的观点表达得更加突出！
其实从上面的scripts中我们可以看出他犯了和Sample 1中同样的错误。整个陈述需要多扩展几个sub-points来支撑起来。譬如，可以从学习并且了解多领域多学科的知识对将来的就业会有很好的帮助等方面来展开。具体如下：It is easier for the college students to find jobs after graduation once they acquire the knowledge from several subject areas; study more will enrich their minds and accumulate their experience.这样整个陈述内容就显得饱满许多。
enrich表示 improve the quality or flavor of something.
例句：Reading enriches our minds.
Enlarge表示say or write more about something; add details to something.也就是详述的意思。
例句：Can you enlarge on what has already said?
I think the broad education is better for college students for the reason that they can get more information about more subjects. They can find which one they really like from the study period. The second reason is that the broad education can get more opportunities for students to seek jobs in big companies.
（1）Original: They can find which one they really like from the study period.
Revised: They can find out the subject area which one they really like during the study period.
Find后面需要加一个宾语，而且the study period表示学习过程通常用during来修饰.
(2) Original: The second reason is that the broad education can get more opportunities for students to seek jobs in big companies.
Revised: The second reason is that the college students can obtain more opportunities to seek jobs in big companies after receiving broad education.